Extensive post on the Run

Ok seriously i lost the mood or inspiration to post on the run right after coz you know once it's gone it's gone right.. however today i got the inspiration back to write up extensively on what happened on the day of the run.

Josh Yeoh was speaking today in North Zone however surprisingly or whether it's coincidentally the same topic that i've spoke on in youth, which was from Matthew 25 - "The parable of the ten virgins". But well that wasn't what caught my attention. What reminded me was when he mentioned about how it's not about how you start the race but how well you finish it. "Not starting strong and then fizzle out later" the words of Josh Yeoh.

So back to the point of the race. I reached Queensbay at about 2:30, an hour before the race started since it was the required time for us to check in for the race and you know prepare myself mentally and warmup and all that stuff. Being to a marathon for the first time was a little exciting and yet at the same time i felt nervous. Knowing that there were friends running at the same time was also encouraging so i kept on a look out for some one that i knew and met Nicholes, Aaron and Ash at the bag counter where after that lost him when he went to keep his bags in Aaron's car. So i slowly walked around and do whatever i had to do for warmup, stretching and preparing myself mentally while still trying to lookout for someone i know but.... to no avail.

Then i decided, "oh well, just find a spot and run lah" which i did. I lined up somewhere not too far from the starting line in between the older folks which were much more experienced i think haha some of them carried the water pack on their backs, others even with the mini med kit whereas i only had my watch and my heart.. XD so the time came closer to the start and everyone was cheering and getting excited about the race. For me it was just exhilirating to be in my first ever marathon and not just any marathon but the Penang Bridge International Marathon. A place i'm so ever familiar with and that i use everyday. I've been checking out the running route a few days before the race to see how far down the bridge i will be running and boy was it a distance. I would be running at least 3/4 of the bridge almost to the other side.

the time came for the kick off for the half marathon to start and as soon as the pop sound was heard everyone cheered as they headed to step over the starting mat to get their times checked in. I started with the early crowd and ran strong for the queensbay stretch pushing as far up as i can before keeping a steadier pace. Then before reaching the bridge i heard someone called my name i though it was Nic but then it turned out to be Deswyn who then overtook me but i did trail behind him, then Sam also appeared and both of them ran together and started to pull away from me but still i kept my pace lah or tried. Was my first time to be running ever so long. I estimated to finish in around 2h 25mins at most which was why i kept on a pace that i felt could take me far steadily. Finially steeping foot on the bridge was fun, and with the sponge stations, water stations etc etc it felt awesome and i realized i was in a marathon. All these while i've been seeing people run on TV grabbing the sponges and water and thinking, "wah, so cool free water somemore" and now i'm able to do it myself.

The wind was nice on the bridge and the temprature wasn't hot or too cold but just nice don't know whether it was just my feeling or was it because there were so many people who were also running blocking the frontal wind in my face. So i kept on running and running. As i drew near the the centre i felt my heart rate getting to high and my breath getting a little lesser and my legs were growing a little tired. then there was this banana station on the bridge, being first time to experience all these i just grabbed whatever i could lol... it was like having a feast on the run lol get it? nvm.. so makan minum everything on the bridge, can even litter suka hati hahaha. Thanks to the MPPP for being so kind to pick up after us. So i ran and ran to reach the turn about as fast as i can and *Bleep* my time at the turn around was 52mins(as previous post) then i grabbed a cold 100plus and sponges. refreshed myself so i can keep running at good pace. But as i came close to the mid bridge again suddenly my muscles started feeling tight. i think it was the 100 plus that was too cold that i took at the turn. that was one of the possibilites that popped into my mind. But i kept pushing and the lines "I'll run till i finish the race" from the song Lord of Lords was playing in my head. Then i thought "oh,no don't think that's gonna happen since my muscles were getting tighter and eventually i could run no more and had to walk.. and the song became, "I'll walk till i finish the race..." but i tried to get myself cooled and rested so i can run again.

I started running again after the midpoint of the bridge again after walking abit then the muscles started pulling again before i got off the bridge so i paced myself to walking and then running after a while and walk again. but when i got off the bridge it was so painful that i seriously couldn't run anymore and i had to walk. But i didn't wanna lose my pace too much so i tried walking as fast as i can until i heard the beeps of runners checking in their times into the machine. That's when i thought just run a little more to pass that thingy then slowly walk again but i guess my muscles didn't quite agree with that decision so i cramped up bad right at the motor bridge. And the disappointing part was it took the Red Crescent at least a minute to come over and ask me if i was ok... i mean duh.. i'm cramping here. Give me something fast. They had no spray, no cream, no gel, nothing... only plain ol' iced sponges and an ice pack. But for me it was whatever works at that time so sat there on the floor for a short rest where Chris passed me haha. Then when my legs were a little better i took for the marker when i saw Nic again.

So we decided to take it slow for now then nearer to the end then we'll run on. so reaching the roundabout side, Nicholes wanted to run on and i tried but as soon as i started my legs rebeled again. So i told Nic to go on ahead while i pressed on walking while stretching in between when i felt the muscles tightening up again. So i walked and walked till i reached queensbay where i gathered all my might and sprinted to the finish hoping i didn't cramp up along the way and thank God i didn't. but managed to finish the race. Thank God.

Lessons Learnt
I think what i've learned from this was i had to plan next time if i'm going to run again, which i think i will. But more importantly was the spiritualy aspect of lessons that i learned. Yes it wasn't about how good i start, over taking people and running up ahead, starting strong but at the end giving up and falling out. It's about finishing strong in what you start. And as i reflected on this i realized that i walk with God can also be in the same boat. Which i pray for it to not happen. I want to run the race and to run it well, not falling short because of being worn out for replying too much on my own strength instead of relying on God. I realized also that I haven't been spending time with God a lot lately which i need to get back to.

I asked myself the question, Why do i push myself into working overtime for the extra income in my pocket instead of serving Him and believe for Him to provide for my needs? Sometimes there's things that just not necessary. It's very much about how much you are willing to give God today and not say "Oh since i'm gonna give him my all tomorrow, i'll live for me first today" everyday should be for Him, because He's the one who gave us life in the first place.

Thredding the tarmac

1025 D19867 JAMES TAN CHU KWANG 02:39:31 02:38:47 00:52:29 01:52:14

So there, that's my results for the run in order of placing, bib number, name, country, official time, net time, time for turning at the bridge, and e- gate turning.

Was a good experience for me being in a marathon for the first time although it's a half marathon it's good enough for me hahaha. Tiring endeavor although exciting and exhilarating while going through it. It's very much an endurance race compared to the shorter races and also proper preparation is needed to finish the race. more updates coming up later.. still tired from the lack of sleep :P

My take on tithing..

Now that I've started working somewhat consistently I'm getting paid... lolz obviously right? So it feels good to get cash stashed in your pocket where you can just get stuff you can't when you didn't have the financial freedom. But then with the capability to spend also comes the responsibility to save. And that's something I've so far failed to do... well not because i didn't plan. I did plan but things happen see... like computer breaking down, motorbike breaking down... getting ripped off by repair guy by the road.. -.- and so on.. So yeah failed i did in trying to save... sigh...

But well like any good Christian would... I would give my tenth to God. Now then the question that comes in is.. how much should i give then if i get more because of the crazy OT pays i get. So i thought to myself.. well i should definitely give 10% of my agreed upon income paid to me, and the rest is bonus right?? haha well....... NO. But i struggled with that for a bit. I kept thinking c'mon.. That was my Over Sweat poured into my Over Time so it should be my bonus.. after all i've given my tenth so this IS the bonus i'm getting. But then i think God gently poked my brain and said.. "well, where did you get the strength or the life to go through that OT?" then i was dumbfounded.. literally. So... i was like
"Ok, God thank You for reminding me that you are the giver of life and all things, so giving back to You is just my show of appreciation to something that can never be repaid in full."
Seriously what God has given us and enabled us to do is far more worth than what we can keep for ourselves. We should not feel obliged or burdened to give to God, but rather with such a thankful heart because knowing that we are alive alone is God given and to be able to work is a blessing from God. imagine if you were immobilized and not being able to work, nothing you can do, life would definitely mean nothing. So give to God because of all He has given you. LIFE!

So It Was

The last couple of weeks was a weird period for me, with so many things going on and things i have to do plus the craziness of working while trying to juggle so many other things in church and all just gave me a mental blow i guess. I turned to the emo mode all of a sudden without a guide to pull me out of it, everything that happened just wasn't right. Started with office stuff first getting a little off hand, then to floorball, then to youth commitments, prep for camp etc etc the list will just go on and on.

I think i was so down that even in my facebook i wrote i was at the bottom of the bottomless pit, which doesn't make sense.. haha see what being emo does to your brains? It takes time to climb out of a well once you've fallen into it. It's slippery, it's dark and wet, and sometimes you'd feel like just giving up from climbing out. But that's until someone comes along and throws a rope down to you. Now i'm still on my way up grabbing on to the rope that was given me to hold. Thank God for being there when i needed Him.

I don't know what is it in me that makes me strive to be good at what i do, or trying to be good at whatever i do. there's just this feeling of i must be the best. I don't know whether it's a good thing or a bad thing, and with that i tend to push myself to the limits, until i break i might not stop. Then I'm reminded of how life is fragile, and then i thought to myself, then i should just live it to the fullest right? I remind myself of how i want to live a legacy and also leave a legacy. The legacy to live a life of love and that's giving, caring for people just like the person who left me with it did. Bringing life and hope to people around me, building lives instead of breaking them. But as i reflect on what i've done so far it seems like none of that has been accomplished. I just feel like i've not done anything that's worth a living. I don't seem to treat people with love like some people do. I end up yelling at people and telling them what to do instead of guiding them through.

There's times when i feel at the bottom but not show it. Although as much as i want to be transparent with life but sometimes people expect us to different. It's not easy being a minister's son and a leader. But then it's here i'm reminded that who I rely on will determine the outcome of what i do. Who i find strength in will be the answer to the journey's hardship. Am i living a life of surrender or am i walking in my own sight. So many things just flood my thoughts, but at the end of the day as I walk out a life of service to Abba Father he will surely take me through.